10 Steps to Combat Anger
Anger can turn you into a person you barely recognize. Rage, wrath, fury or whatever you choose to call it, the perils of uncontrollable anger are many. Being angry is normal. It is a necessary emotion every mortal possess. But having uncontrollable anger is what we are referring to here. Knowing what triggers you and learning to deal with it are probably the two most important aspects of a life lessons one needs to be adept at.
Festering anger for too long brings about bitterness. And bitterness leads to resentment, hatred and feelings of vengeance. It may make one commit an act that can change the course of his life forever.
In this article, we are going to lay down 10 tried and tested methods which can help one win over anger.
10 Commonly Used Anger Management Techniques
1. Realize that anger is a deal breaker for you
You can correct yourself only if you realize that you need to be corrected. So even in a fit of rage before things tread south, check yourself. Hold yourself and allow yourself to breathe. Breathing properly has a calming effect and can slow down your emotional outburst. Counting from 20 backwards in your mind is actually not a bad idea. It can help you to pause and ponder. Remember for someone trying to exercise self constraint, this realization is the most important step.
2. Assert yourself in writing
A lot of people feel that if they cannot express their anger they are incapable of voicing their anguish and resentment. If there is something which caused you to be angry in the first place and you feel the need to put it on the table, try articulating it in writing. This will help you to reset and reorganize your thoughts and move on.
3. Leave the location
Well, storming out is not bad sometimes. If you feel that controlling your emotions is becoming tough and you find yourself seething, then bring yourself outdoors. Take a stroll or sit somewhere and get some fresh air until you can recompose yourself. In fact, this could help you from facing or creating an ugly situation.
4. Avoid confrontation
A lot of times lack of communication could cause misunderstandings and anger could stem from it. In such a situation, you need to hear out the opposing point of view. If you thing that you cannot do that without unleashing your temper, hold back. Try talking over the phone or writing instead. This will give you time to come to terms with your own emotion and not be carried on with your fury.
5. Think before you open your mouth
Remember that words one spoken cannot be taken back. They have the power to make and break relationships. So try not to have a conversation at the heat of the moment. Allow others to speak and respect other’s point of view.
6. Try thinking of similar situations where you managed your anger successfully
Previous instances where you have been successful in overcoming your rage can be good reference points when you are trying to face anger. Think how being conscious about the whole situation sealed the deal.
7. Do not be obstinate
Being stubborn and not accepting of others point of view can create a dead lock and can add fuel to the fire. If you are open minded and can take a step forward in first understanding and analyzing the situation, then anger can be held at bay.
8. Do not be vindictive
Holding a grudge and being egoistic never lets one to move on. You are trapped in time and the slightest trigger can unleash the fury. Forgiving can be the first step towards self healing. Do not criticize others. Try thinking where you may have gone wrong.
9. Come out of your past
If one bad experience in the past has left you bitter and cause you to go back to it every time you are aggrieved, it could be the possible cause of your anger. Stop revisiting the past and think about the possibilities in the future. Remember you get nothing crying over spilt milk.
10. Try to think of a possible solution
If something cause you to lose your temper, try thinking of a solution that can help prevent the situation. If the traffic snarls in the morning while going to work gets to you, try leaving home half an hour early. Be honest to yourself and recognize the signs which could cause you to fail in your anger management endeavor.