A Painful Love – Truth or Fiction
Love is known to generate some of the most painful side effects from people killing for it to dying for it. And yet, for something with claims of being so beautiful, it carries so much pain. Is it the real thing or is it something else closely related to but not really love? Is a painful love really possible and are we doomed to endure it just so we can get a slight experience of what true love promises.
All those who have known love have definitely also known pain, be it love for your family or love for your partner as in a romantic love to the love of friends. The thing is that when we open ourselves to love, we are also left vulnerable to any other things that use the same passage way as love such as betrayal and in comes the pain. Even when parents send off their children to college, they can’t help but feel torn apart and yet this is what they want for them. So then it seems that love comes with the burden of being painful at times. For all the pleasure you get, there is some pain to be felt.
New School of Thought
However, there is a new school of thought that is pushing the view that love in itself knows no pain. They say that it is the feelings associated with love that are causing us the pain such as fear, jealousy, and our own insecurities. This would imply that if we were secure in our love it’d be free of any pain. They attempt to push for the philosophy that a human being can exist as whole and complete without anyone else. That we should love ourselves first and then since our happiness does not depend on other people then we will have love that is pain free.
This theory indicates that any love that causes too many of these pain causing emotions is not good for any person. It does not matter who the object of the love is. If it causes you more pain than joy then it is not love. True love knows no pain for you are complete. So even if there is a threat of this love disintegrating, you can still not bear it as it is the centre of your universe.
Most pain that arises out of love is deliberate as one party tries to pay back another for some perceived real or imagined pain and this should not be tolerated. If your partner continues to do something even when they know it causes you pain then they are not worth the pain. On the other hand, there is pain that can not be avoided such as that associated with the death of a loved one. This kind of pain, while not deliberate, is also the most hurting, with some people even failing to recover and collapsing into a pit of depression and insanity.
What about pain caused by unrequited love?
As for the pain caused by unrequited love, move on with your life. If someone is too blind to appreciate all your amazing qualities then they do not deserve for you to cry over them. This is the one kind of painful love you are sure you want to stay away from. Do what you can to busy yourself till you have gotten over this corrupting emotion over something that never even happened.
So in conclusion, it would seem that a painful love is not the real love as we have been led to believe, but it is what most people have come to expect. It is therefore upon us to try and improve the self image we have to know that we deserve a painless love and work towards getting it. Friends and lovers who continuously cause you to feel worthless should be thrown out while family members who belittle you should be talked to and if they show no change should be completely avoided. Love yourself first and then you are bound to experience the pleasure of a painless love.